What happens when children are more mature than their parents? Growing up with an emotionally unavailable, immature, or selfish parent is painful, but rarely discussed. In this breakthrough book, clinical psychologist Lindsay C. Gibson exposes an often overlooked, yet extremely common syndrome that shapes the lives of so many people.
Lindsay C. Gibson, PsyD, is a clinical psychologist who carries out individual psychotherapy with adults in her private practice. She is the author of Who You Were Meant To Be: A Guide to Finding or Recovering Your Life’s Purpose and writes a monthly column on well-being for Tidewater Women magazine. In the past, she has served as an assistant adjunct professor of psychology for the College of William and Mary, as well as for Old Dominion University.
"Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents is written with the
wisdom and heart of a seasoned therapist and the mind of a scholar
who's spent decades poring over psychological research and theory.
In this book, Lindsay C. Gibson seamlessly blends this impressive
body of knowledge with the real-life experiences of her clients to
create a user-friendly and highly readable book. ... This book is
not about blame but rather about understanding oneself on a deep
level and learning to heal."
--Esther Lerman Freeman, PsyD, clinical associate professor at the
Oregon Health and Science University School of Medicine
"Based on years of reading, research, and working with patients,
psychologist Lindsay C. Gibson has written an outstanding book
about the multiple ways that emotionally immature parents impact
the lives of their adult children. I highly recommend Adult
Children of Emotionally Immature Parents for all readers who want
to understand the parent/child dynamic. This is an uplifting book
that provides hope and superb coping strategies for those who find
it difficult or impossible to bond with parents who lack empathy
and sensitivity. ... Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents
is full of wisdom that will enable you to relate to your family
members and friends in the healthiest way possible--no matter what
age you are--and possibly even to recognize what's behind some of
the dysfunctional exchanges depicted in the news and in popular
culture."
--Robin Cutler, PhD, historian and author of A Soul on Trial
"Children cannot choose their parents. Unfortunately, many
individuals grow up suffering the life-shaping adversities of
having emotionally immature, neglectful parents. With wisdom and
compassion, Lindsay C. Gibson enables readers to recognize and
better understand these toxic relationships and to create novel,
healthy paths of healing. This book provides a powerful opportunity
for self-help and is a wonderful resource for therapists to
recommend to clients in need."
--Thomas F. Cash, PhD, Professor Emeritus of psychology at Old
Dominion University, and author of The Body Image Workbook
"Lindsay C. Gibson, a very experienced psychotherapist, wrote Adult
Children of Emotionally Immature Parents to provide guidance to
adults for self-help in resolving anxiety, depression, and
relationship difficulties that result from having emotionally
immature parents. It is a thorough and detailed description of
immature parents, children's experience of their parenting, and
methods to resolve the resulting problems. There are many useful
examples from Gibson's psychotherapy clients. The book includes
helpful exercises for self-understanding. A person can use the book
to develop emotional maturity and deeper relationships."
--Neill Watson, PhD, research professor and Professor Emeritus of
psychology at the College of William and Mary, and clinical
psychologist who does research on anxiety, depression, and
psychotherapy
"Lindsay C. Gibson, PsyD, gives practical insight into a prevalent
problem...The book is impeccably clear...This utter lack of
confusion makes the book quite soothing, despite the heavy subject.
The soothing effect is amplified by Gibson's caring, knowledgeable
voice--it's easy to believe her when she says, 'I wish the very
best for you.' This book can be a source of healing for adult
children of these kinds of parents--particularly for young adults.
But it's also insightful for bosses, therapists, friends, and
anyone else who works with, cares for, and supports the people
described in this book. Gibson's professional background allows her
to anticipate people's emotions and reticence--and urge them gently
forward."
--Foreword Magazine
"Lindsay C. Gibson's Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents
is an insightful and compassionate guide for anyone seeking to
understand and overcome the long-term impact of growing up in an
emotionally barren family. Here you will find sage advice and
simple practices that will help you break free from old patterns,
connect more deeply with yourself and others, and, ultimately, be
the person you were always meant to be."
--Ronald J. Frederick, PhD, psychologist and author of Living Like
You Mean It
"Lindsay C. Gibson's book, Adult Children of Emotionally Immature
Parents, is filled with clinical vignettes that will resonate with
adult children of emotionally immature parents. The book also
offers practical advice and exercises for identifying one's true
self and avoiding the pitfalls of self-images, relationships, and
fantasies that undermine one's psychological well-being. Finally,
the book provides solid guidelines for interacting with one's
emotionally immature parents in a manner that avoids painful and
damaging recreations of the past. Readers will find relief from
recognizing that they are not alone and that they are understood by
this remarkable clinician."
--B. A. Winstead, PhD, professor of psychology at Old Dominion
University and the Virginia Consortium Program in Clinical
Psychology, and coeditor of Psychopathology: Foundations for a
Contemporary Understanding, Third Edition
"Lindsay C. Gibson's insightful book offers the 'emotionally
lonely' a step-by-step journey toward self-awareness and healing.
Gibson's revealing anecdotes, enlightening exercises, and honest
insight lead the reader to a better understanding of how to connect
more fully with oneself and others. This is an excellent book for
anyone who feels isolated from family members and seeks to enjoy a
more emotionally connected life."
--Peggy Sijswerda, editor and publisher of Tidewater Women
(tidewaterwomen.com) and Tidewater Family (tidewaterfamily.com),
and author of Still Life with Sierra
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